OT: CBS News No Speeka Englisha

President Obama: The economy, the Congress, the future

Steve Kroft:
We have a new CBS poll, which is out this weekend. And I'll give you the news that's good for you first. People like you. They respect you. They think that you're working hard. And they realize that you faced an enormous amount of trouble and problems, many of them inherited. And you're [sic!] approval rating is four times higher than the Congress.

Not bad. They're approval is quite good, I take it. There doing remarkably well.

Mischugene Old Yenta Dethroned at last: Harriet Klausner no longer No.1

Unless it's a bug that will soon be fixed, Amazon removed the "classic" reviewer ratings: what used to be called "new reviewer ranks" is now the only rank displayed on the site. Aaaaand, our dear Harriet is no longer No.1 however you look at it. She's the proud owner of the rank 815 (as of this moment). This is still about a million times too high, but, well, wow, come on, let us celebrate what we can.

Not only did she lose her absurd topmost place, but her new-style ranking, uncharacteristically, went down a couple of hundred places in the last month or so (she had been bobbing between 650 and 700 for a few years prior to that, submerging a bit and then promptly being rescued (by the Klausner Protection Squad? who knows...)). To be honest, I did not believe Amazon would make such a step, ever (PD Harris did insinuate it as a given long ago, and dayum!, he was right... 'course that was accidental, so let's not make too much of this). Matter of fact, I thought they (Amazon) might introduce even more parallel hierarchies, so as to enable everyone and their sister to be No.1 in some dimension of this multidimensional universe of bullshit all-five-star reviewing.

Well, it's always a pleasure to be proven wrong like that. Today's a good day then: while "the witch" isn't really dead, she's no longer the No.1 witch. Good bye, Harriet, dear, don't let the door hit you in the ass on your way out. 'Cause that'd be very "action-packed" and, as followers of the "subgenre", we would "relish". Over the top of the Empire State building, if you know what I mean.

---

And now, boys and girls, let us hold hands and chant:

Harriet Klausner sat on a wall,
Harriet Klausner had a great fall.
All the publishing industry shills and all the useless scribblers with fake posting accounts
Couldn't put Harriet Klausner back on top of the wall.

O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay!

Standard Disclaimer for Harriet Klausner Reviews:

Courtesy of poster "Guy the Gorilla":

Guy the Gorilla says:
Standard Disclaimer for Harriet Klausner Reviews:

If you are a bona-fide Amazon customer sufficiently interested in this specific book to be reading reviews about it, as well as appended comments, please be advised that you should disregard this particular "review," seemingly "written" by one Harriet Klausner, Amazon's "Classic Number 1 Reviewer." For my part, I cannot provide you with any helpful information regarding whether this specific book you are interested in is good, bad, or mediocre. That is because I have not read it.

And neither has Harriet Klausner.

If I have piqued your curiosity, please, go to this link (it's for a Harriet Klausner review from about a week or so ago), read the comments, and consider the evidence and the numbers yourself:

http://www.amazon.com/review/R36ZCKXKW96MI3/ref=cm_aya_cmt?ie=UTF8&ASIN=0425234622#wasThisHelpful

[BTW - This is the set of comments associated with a book called "The Insider" if you are having trouble getting the link to work.]

I also want to point out, and you can easily confirm this yourself, that over the last 9 days, Harriet Klausner has "read" and "reviewed" 105 books, including 49 on September 2nd and 49 on September 3rd. Assuming 300 pages a book, she has theoretically read 31,500 pages during this period. Given that there are only 12,960 minutes in a 9 day period, even if she did nothing but read every second of every one of those 9 days, never stopping to eat, sleep, or use the loo, she would still need to read at a rate of 2.5 pages per minute.

And assuming that is somehow possible, when did she find the time to write 105 reviews during that period?

I invite you to assess these "reviews" yourself. Do they not look like they were simply plagiarized from the dust jacket or inside pages of the book (depending on whether the book is a hardcover or MMP)? Or perhaps lifted from information already prepared by the publishing company? Something fishy is going on here. And note that every book she reviews gets either a 4 or 5 star rating - in this period - 73 5-star ratings and the remaining 32 books receiving a 4-star rating. She likes EVERYTHING she reads? Seriously?

Also - please read the comments that accompany many of the reviews. You will see that there are large numbers of people who are aware of this situation, who make it a habit to constantly check in and write comments to warn unsuspecting persons like yourself that all is not kosher here.

Cheers

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Great job, Guy! This should be automatically prepended to every Klausner "review". Here's a snapshot, just in case (as usual, click on image for full size):

Harriet Klausner reviews blatantly plagiarised Assassin of Secrets by Q. R. Markham (five stars, natch)

We got mail:

11/16/11 3:23:41 PM, [our correspondent; name withheld] wrote:
Interesting discussion about plagairism among writers after a debut novel was debunked as a massive fraud. The book was reviewed and raved about by, you guessed it, Harriett Klausner.

Check out the discussion:

http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=229396

And thanks for this info, dear Correspondent (we never use names unless asked to do so specifically). We appreciate any information about our dear beloved object of veneration here -- although in this particular case, I'd say, the sin isn't too great, after all how would one, even an honest reader, know that a book is a plagiarisation? And of course, since Harriet only reads jacket copy, catching plagiarism is even less likely. Hell, a while ago she even ignored the fact that a book she reviewed had a protagoniste named Harriet Klausner (it wasn't mentioned in the back-cover blurb). These are all insignificant details that won't stop the Klausner juggernaut. Rock on, Harriet!

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For those not in the know already, the book in question is Assassin of Secrets by one Q. R. Markham. Here's a link to Harriet's review of it ("superb espionage thriller" is her evaluation. I wonder if the "fans of subgenre" will "relish" and if it's "fast paced"... but it probably is: all Harriet books are that way). Just in case the review gets pulled, I took a snapshot of it as it is now (click on image for real size).



Enjoy!

OT: Log off Amazon (link)

I found the old link (that used to be on the Help page; it is no longer there, but it still works). Here it is (click on it to log off Amazon): http://www.amazon.com/gp/help/customer/sign-out.html/

There also is (yes, there is still) an official log-off link, only it's on a different page now: it used to be on the Help page, whereas now it's on the "Your Account" page. Go there and look at the right/top field saying "you're logged in as [your name]. You should be logged in, of course; when you are, right under your name there will be a "Sign Off" link.

So the bottom line is, it is still possible to log off. Don't forget to do so after using a public computer.

OT: Logging off Amazon - Impossibility?

A query from a friend I was unable to answer: how to log off Amazon? Amazon likes to get you to log in (log-in link on every page), but they appear exceedingly reluctant to let you ever log off (no log-off link, ever). Does anyone know where the log-off link can be found on Amazon? All sites I know has a "log off" link on every page you visit; not Amazon. My friend's problem was that she logged in on a public computer and was unable to log off. I looked around and couldn't find anything. There used to be a well-hidden log-off link on the Help page, but it's no longer there.

Klausner: insightless charlatan dunce

Very nice characterization (courtesy of Thomas E. Davis):

Thomas E. Davis says:
insightless charlatan dunce

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2 of 2 people think this post adds to the discussion. Do you?

In reply to an earlier post on Oct 2, 2011 5:03:23 AM PDT
Tommy D says:
I always wondered what her middle names might be - thanks Thomas!

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1 of 1 people think this post adds to the discussion. Do you?

I think this is the kind of post that very much adds to discussion. Thank you.