Tuesday, May 27, 2014

A Family Affair (Or, Fun with eBay Feedback)

We all know that Harriet gets free books from publishers.  And we all know, by now, that someone at the Klausner home is selling these books on half.com under her son's name.

If you're familiar with the eBay/half.com feedback system, you know that sellers can respond to feedback.  Someone in Klausnerland has done so many times.  Let's look at some examples, shall we?  (Feedback pages are dynamic so click on the links to see screenshots.)



Did you know that no one in the Klausner household reads?

Buyer says: AWESOME BOOK!!! Arrived Quick and in Great Condition!!
eric_k1979's response: thanks - the "prime" family reader enjoyed that novel

Methinks the quotation marks should have been around "reader," not "prime"...



Harriet is not only a "reader" (or "rader" or "reder" or however she's spelling it these days), she's also a "book lover" (apparently three times in a row).

Buyer says: INSTANT delivery, great packaging, book in mint condition-thanks!
eric_k1979's response: you got it already -wow - mint because my family's prime reader is a book lover

No, it's "mint" because it was never opened.
 


Someone has a creepy sense of humor.

Buyer says: fine, upstanding young seller, the kind I want to marry my daughter
eric_k1979's response: Sorry –late in responding due to school. How old is your daughter? Only kidding

Buyer, if you only knew...



Looks like Stanley is eager to get the books out of the house.

Buyer says: Lowest price new or as-new book. Must have shipped it instantly. Recommended!
eric_k1979's response: My dad drives past the main Atlanta area post office - saves at least 2 days

So the whole family is complicit in this scheme, is that what you're saying?



Do we detect a bit of hostility regarding Hattie's housekeeping skills?

Buyer says: FAST shipping!! thanks so much! great seller! book is in mint condition.
eric_k1979's response: thanks -most are brand new but I lower rating due to poor storage facility

Poor storage facility, indeed.



Oops, looks like Hattie spilled RELISH on the package.

Buyer says: exceeded expectations!! oh...<g>...packaging smelled like a deli...only outside
eric_k1979's response: My dad packed it for me as I was at school; he has no sense of smell. Enjoy
Buyer replies: This us what makes this "business" a real joy!!...Dad's are good!!

I wonder what other senses Stanley has lost over the years?



It's all about saving money at the Klausner home.

Buyer says: Book in excellent condition. Thanks! It's tacky to reuse envelopes though.
eric_k1979's response: Agree- I'm just a student so need to keep expenses down even reusing packages

Getting all your inventory for free is another way to keep expenses down!



Did frantic "reading" and "reviewing" cause Hattie to neglect a hole in the roof?

Buyer says: Sale cancelled due to water damaged book but I was informed immediately.
eric_k1979's response: I apologize - but I still cannot figure out how that box got wet.

Because I really, really want to maintain the illusion I have created that the "wet" substance was water.



Got some problems telling the truth, do we?

Buyer says: The book arrived in excellent condition. Looks brand new. Thank you very much.
eric_k1979's response: Thank you - book read once by a book lover; that is why I sell at like new

book jacket copy mangled read once by a book hater lover (There, I fixed that for you.  You can thank me later.)



Ooh, he wavers.

Buyer says: DID NOT REALIZE THAT THE BOOK WAS "NEW!" THANKS & I WILL BE BACK FOR SURE AAA++
eric_k1979's response: Thank you - I think the book was read once by a book lover who hates even folds

You *think* the book was read once.  Right.  And I *think* that Nigerian prince who sent me that e-mail really has millions of dollars to give me.  All I need to do is provide a bank account number!



Oops, did someone rely on Harriet's "review" before purchasing a book, then find out the book was a stinker?

Buyer says: Very reputable seller.
eric_k1979's response: thank you - I am truly am sorry about the book - my mom said it is great

99.7+% of ALL books get 4 or 5 stars from HK.  Buyer beware!



Let's worry about packaging...

Buyer says: Careful packaging and fast shipping.
eric_k1979's response: thank you - packaging is the only part of the sales that still concerns me

But who cares about ethics?



I'd share more, but I've just paged through 100+ pages of eBay feedback.  That's quite enough for one day.

Saturday, May 17, 2014

Harriet Sells TWO Copies of a Book BEFORE the Release Date!

Cold Shot by Mark Henshaw goes on sale on May 20, 2014, but Harriet has TWO HARDCOVER COPIES on sale right now on half.com (click on the images to enlarge):



Take that, first sale doctrine!

Thursday, May 1, 2014

Fraud Hattie Stats for April 2014

These stats can also be found on her latest fake review


Date
Fake Reviews
Avg
YTD
Votes
Helpful
%
Not Helpful
%
Jan
2012
214
6.90
6.90
1128
545
48%
583
52%
Feb
2012
203
7.25
7.08
661
458
69%
203
31%
Mar
2012
219
7.06
7.07
818
572
70%
246
30%
Apr
2012
195
6.50
6.93
854
598
70%
256
30%
May
2012
214
6.90
6.92
828
553
67%
275
33%
Jun
2012
189
6.30
6.82
768
446
58%
322
42%
Jul
2012
215
6.94
6.84
725
420
58%
305
42%
Aug
2012
215
6.94
6.85
748
442
59%
306
41%
Sep
2012
198
6.60
6.82
657
429
65%
228
35%
Oct
2012
229
7.39
6.88
855
518
61%
337
39%
Nov
2012
117
3.90
6.61
304
191
63%
113
37%
Dec
2012
72
2.32
6.25
366
179
49%
187
51%
Jan
2013
101
3.26
3.26
338
207
61%
131
39%
Feb
2013
91
3.25
3.25
245
179
73%
66
27%
Mar
2013
87
2.81
3.10
261
183
70%
78
30%
Apr
2013
99
3.30
3.15
203
152
75%
51
25%
May
2013
120
3.87
3.30
231
149
65%
82
35%
Jun
2013
106
3.53
3.34
144
83
58%
61
42%
Jul
2013
93
3.00
3.29
198
119
60%
79
40%
Aug
2013
93
3.00
3.25
232
148
64%
84
36%
Sep
2013
92
3.07
3.23
190
143
75%
47
25%
Oct
2013
117
3.77
3.29
205
152
74%
53
26%
Nov
2013
84
2.80
3.24
93
53
57%
40
43%
Dec
2013
62
2.00
3.14
88
50
57%
38
43%
Jan
2014
71
2.29
2.29
122
92
75%
30
25%
Feb
2014
89
2.87
2.58
143
118
83%
25
17%
Mar
2014
105
3.39
2.85
139
105
76%
34
24%
Apr
2014
71
2.29
2.71
123
97
79%
26
21%











Date
Relish
Fans
Rank
AVP's
Vine's
VPR
HVPR
NHVPR
Jan
2012
25
2555
873
3
2
5.27
2.55
2.72
Feb
2012
16
2555
1053
11
1
3.26
2.26
1.00
Mar
2012
17
2555
1069
3
0
3.74
2.61
1.12
Apr
2012
15
2555
1077
9
0
4.38
3.07
1.31
May
2012
17
2555
1075
4
0
3.87
2.58
1.29
Jun
2012
20
2555
1069
7
1
4.06
2.36
1.70
Jul
2012
22
2555
1106
7
6
3.37
1.95
1.42
Aug
2012
12
2555
1200
4
2
3.48
2.06
1.42
Sep
2012
9
2592
1266
9
1
3.32
2.17
1.15
Oct
2012
23
2606
1375
6
2
3.73
2.26
1.47
Nov
2012
12
2617
1463
4
0
2.60
1.63
0.97
Dec
2012
3
2633
1666
5
1
5.08
2.49
2.60
Jan
2013
9
2651
1735
3
1
3.35
2.05
1.30
Feb
2013
7
2666
1779
2
2
2.69
1.97
0.73
Mar
2013
9
2681
1805
6
2
3.00
2.10
0.90
Apr
2013
16
2688
1851
3
4
2.05
1.54
0.52
May
2013
18
2695
1929
3
3
1.93
1.24
0.68
Jun
2013
13
2703
1962
3
5
1.36
0.78
0.58
Jul
2013
18
2712
1989
0
3
2.13
1.28
0.85
Aug
2013
15
2716
2069
2
2
2.49
1.59
0.90
Sep
2013
11
2725
1991
1
0
2.07
1.55
0.51
Oct
2013
13
2738
1966
0
1
1.75
1.30
0.45
Nov
2013
9
2747
2012
0
2
1.11
0.63
0.48
Dec
2013
4
2759
2057
0
1
1.42
0.81
0.61
Jan
2014
7
2766
2048
0
3
1.72
1.30
0.42
Feb
2014
4
2775
2046
0
1
1.61
1.33
0.28
Mar
2014
8
2788
2069
0
4
1.32
1.00
0.32
Apr
2014
7
2792
2054
0
2
1.73
1.37
0.37