Friday, August 23, 2013

Some More of Harriet's Favorite Words

More of Harriet's favorite stock phrases (as of August 8, 2013 -- I'm updating my data set but it takes more than 4 hours to run ARAT and export the text of 29,162 "reviews").

More Readers and Fans

readers will appreciate 1,220
readers will enjoy 2,081
fans will appreciate 1,412
fans will enjoy 3,257
action-packed, readers will relish 6
hooks the audience 260
hooks the reader 87

Making Something Innocent Seem Creepy

Note to Harriet: the following two words do NOT mean the same thing.

entreating 75
endearing 126

More "Sub-Genres"

futuristic science fiction 52
cozy 628
cosy 25
chick lit 495
zombie 552
vampire 4,027
paranormal 2,131
shifter 471
ranch romance 72
wounded warrior 47

Harriet Does Abbreviations

BDSM 102
PTSD 132

Some More Words I Don't Think Harriet Really Knows the Meanings Of

segue 102
metaphysical 74
ironic 955
irony 135
cardiac arrest 36

When the Quote Generator Gets Stuck

Note: Often paraphrased.

"I say violence is necessary. It is as American as cherry pie." -- H. Rap Brown 6
"Never work with animals or children." -- W.C. Fields 8
Pace and Intensity Descriptors

Note: Some of these appeared in the last post with hyphens.  But Hattie isn't that consistent with hyphens, so I searched again without.

fast paced 112
action packed 282
faster than the speed 75
never slows down 1,401
never decelerates 47
leisurely paced 25
leisurely-paced 15
frantically paced 1
frantically-paced 1
slow paced 7
slow-paced 5
high octane 31
mayhem 89

Don't Spoil the Ending...

superb finish 7
great ending 9
fabulous climax 8

I Don't Think That's What Raymond Chandler Had in Mind...

middle boiled 2
medium boiled 2
noirish 3
nourish 24
hard boiled 54
hard-boiled 36

Harriet, the Atmospheric Scientist

stratosphere 28
stratospheric 97

The "All-Purpose" Word

Does it mean a couple?  A short story in a collection?  A single volume from a series?  Or ALL THREE? 

entry 1,949
entries 526

A Few More Hattie Specials

Note: By chance, some of the "years old" might be right.  But not very many of them.  Also, "character driven" and "fully developed" appeared in the last post without hyphens.

murdered corpse 78
years old 2,593
years old daughter 217
years old son 133
fully relish 77
character-driven 67
fully-developed 5
armchair 113

A Couple that Defy Categorization

lampoon 202
fjord 6
exhilarating 1,194

And, the Dirty Stuff You Were All Really Waiting For

scrotum 3
banana 28
cherry 29
banana sandwich 2
man meat 5
hardened sword 1
gonad 2
douche 7
suck 236
tup 8
tongue/tonguing 232
tingle 13
wet dream 23
anal 13
dick* 29

*Search was case sensitive to avoid reference to people and/or characters named "Dick."


Deborah Hern said...

Wow. I just came here to post my latest review. And now I wonder how many times *I* write something like 'readers will like' or similar. Not nearly as many as Hattie, since I don't post 100s of reviews in a month.

In other news, I solemnly swear that I have never, ever used the terms "man meat" or "banana sandwich" (???) in any of my reviews. Nor will I. If I do, it's time to call the men with the nets.

Sneaky Burrito said...

"Banana sandwich" is defined on Urban Dictionary. But it's really pretty disgusting so only look it up if you dare.

I haven't been posting book reviews on Amazon for too long, but I now automatically remove as many of Harriet's stock phrases as I happen to catch.

Dona said...

Sneaky B,
Thanks! Hilarious, as usual.

And to Deborah Hern: loved your comment.
So true.

Jen said...

I love peanut butter and banana sandwiches. Just sayin'.

(Hi! New member. Not much time for commenting, but I'll try to post from time to time.)

Sneaky Burrito said...

Welcome, Jen. Don't worry about the activity level -- some of us have more time on our hands than others.

Anonymous said...

Hi, Jen. Welcome to the group!

I bet perverts have wet dreams of good ol' Harriet. Banana sandwich? Man meat? Ooh, they're on any perv's menu.

I was just starting to make progress with my shrink in regards to eschewing fruits and veggies. Well, it goes without saying that I'm back to square one. Thanks. LOL.

Don Reed said...

In what is otherwise an attractive & profitable read, Oliver Sacks's editor of "Uncle Tungsten" (2001 memoir) fell asleep at his desk (and cashed his paycheck anyway).

The second half of the book has Oliver saying repeatedly, "seemed to me."

And the concertina wire of the endless "not only... but[s]" cut up the reader as well.

Any comparison of Sacks to Harriet Hokum is not intended (were this to happen, we'd be pitting an M.I.T. grad against a "speed-reading" pet rock).

Don't you love that crap, "speed reading"?

As if it can be objectively measured for accuracy after someone on the Internet claims they possess that facility...

Bev said...

Welcome to new members Jen and Don! It's great to have you both here with us.

I don't think I want to know what a banana sandwich is...

Bev said...

Oh, and Jen, I'm B. Craven on Amazon. Glad you decided to accept my invitation!

Don Reed said...

Thank you, Bev.

FYI (Non-Hokum related): This nut-ball security system below proved to be impenetrable when I wanted to post a thank you note on another blog (the writing was out-ta-dis-world!).

The word was indecipherable; and the numbers were illegible.

The "im--in-il" trifecta worked like a charm.

The Yale University editor who cranked out "Rossetti & His Circle" was probably the consultant who set this Rube Goldberg scheme up.

As Mike would say, "Cheers."

Malleus said...

I'm glad you caught the "entreating". It's my personal favourite — not only a cliché but also wrong.